The most successful way to win your ex boyfriend back by building up the attraction level between you. This is done slowly over time as your ex begins to realize what he is missing. Because you are trying to show him why he made a mistake, it is important to hide your weaknesses, since they will not do much to entice him.
Too many people go after their ex with negative energy. They act depressed around them, or they call crying and beginning for another chance. This only makes you look weak from your ex's standpoint. It also tells him that he can basically have you anytime he wants. This sad, beaten-down approach only highlights your negative points, and does nothing to sell him on your positives.
By trying to get your ex back with positive reinforcement, you will help spin your relationship in a positive light. Focus on smiling and appearing happy no matter how you feel inside. Reflect on the many things that make you special, and find creative ways to highlight them so your ex will notice. Ignore anything negative that comes up in conversation. If he stays persistent on a negative topic, then talk about how it made you both stronger in the end.
By focusing on your strengths, you can help your ex boyfriend realize why he fell in love with you in the first place. Sometimes we get overwhelmed with the negatives and we need someone to show us the good points as well. This will be your job as you try to get your ex back. Remind your ex why your relationship was special by showing him that you are the right girl for his future.
Before You Contact Your Ex Boyfriend
The period after a break up is a delicate time if you are trying to get your ex back. You need to be careful how you approach your ex and selective in what you say.
First off, don’t call them if you are upset and depressed. If your emotions are unstable then you are much more likely to say or do something you might regret. Take some time to get over the shock of the break up before you proceed.
Secondly, you need to come up with a plan of exactly what you are going to say. Trying to organize your thoughts on the fly is not a good idea. You need to start with the basic small talk, but you also need to work towards finding a resolution to your problems. This can be as simple as brining up the fact that you miss them and wish things would have worked out differently. You may not make much progress in your first conversation, but the ultimate goal is to rebuild the communication between you. Thus, don’t expect to have things change overnight. Settle for smaller goals at first, but always keep your eyes on the goal.
Finally, make sure you are upbeat and positive when talking with your ex. No matter how hard the situation is, always spin things in a positive light. Make your ex believe that your problems can be fixed. Portraying yourself as down or desperate will only add to the uncertainty surrounding your relationship.
The initial levels of contact after a break up are the most difficult, but they are also the most important. Map out a strategy and keep your cool. By going into the situation with a positive attitude you will increase the chances to get your ex back.
First off, don’t call them if you are upset and depressed. If your emotions are unstable then you are much more likely to say or do something you might regret. Take some time to get over the shock of the break up before you proceed.
Secondly, you need to come up with a plan of exactly what you are going to say. Trying to organize your thoughts on the fly is not a good idea. You need to start with the basic small talk, but you also need to work towards finding a resolution to your problems. This can be as simple as brining up the fact that you miss them and wish things would have worked out differently. You may not make much progress in your first conversation, but the ultimate goal is to rebuild the communication between you. Thus, don’t expect to have things change overnight. Settle for smaller goals at first, but always keep your eyes on the goal.
Finally, make sure you are upbeat and positive when talking with your ex. No matter how hard the situation is, always spin things in a positive light. Make your ex believe that your problems can be fixed. Portraying yourself as down or desperate will only add to the uncertainty surrounding your relationship.
The initial levels of contact after a break up are the most difficult, but they are also the most important. Map out a strategy and keep your cool. By going into the situation with a positive attitude you will increase the chances to get your ex back.
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