Some of you ladies have opted for the most difficult of journeys...trying to win back an ex who is a jerk. Now I know most of you say "he only acts that way around his friends." Okay fine, whatever floats your boat. I'm not here to criticize. In fact, today we are going to discuss how to get past this rudeness and touch his inner emotions.
Here are my favorite angles for defusing these situations...
Laugh Along
This is probably the least preferred but it really can lower his guard. If he wants to look cool around his friends then just let him. When the jokes start flying laugh right along with them. Want to take it to another level? Add to the fun by making fun of yourself. Over time this technique will eliminate the "challenge" of putting you down. Obviously this is not for the easily-offended but if you can't beat 'em then join 'em.
Conversation Bombs
No matter how long you dated your ex-boyfriend you likely have some dirt on them. The next time they play the jerk card consider throwing stones right back at them. How does this help you get back together? You might be surprised at the results. One of the big reasons people breakup is because one person is bored with the other. Showing a little spunk can be just the ticket for sparking an attraction.
Disappear
One of the oldest tricks in the book for getting an ex back is what they call "no contact." The theory here is your ex will never miss you if you are always around. If you don't like the way they are treating you then a vacation from your ex might be the best solution. If you go this route then you must commit to it. No phone calls, no emails, no contact. In a perfect situation your ex will reach out to you after they've had time to reflect on their bad behavior.
Good Luck - Elliot
Showing posts with label emotions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label emotions. Show all posts
Making It Easy to Make Up
Emotions run so high after a break up that it is often difficult to make good decisions, especially when you finally get the chance to speak to your ex boyfriend. You want to pour your heart out and say all the right things to get another chance at fixing the relationship.
The problem is that most of the things you are want to say (I'm sorry, I love you, etc.) only make things harder on your ex. They don't feel the same way you do right now, and when you throw out words like "love" it puts them in a bad position. Most boyfriends are not out to destroy your life, they have simply come to a crossroads in their time with you. Apologies and proclamations of your love are words that call for a response...but in this case your ex has nothing positive to say back.
But what if you could take away the pressure and make it easy for your ex boyfriend to make up with you? Choosing the path of least resistance is not necessarily the easy choice when your gut if filled with swirling emotions. However, for the long term it gives you the best chance of getting back with your ex.
Think of it this way...if you had something difficult to tell someone how would you want them to respond? What would your perception of them be if they freaked out about the news? How would it be different if they handled the same news with grace and respect? As you probably see, the latter makes things much easier and leaves things in position for more discussion down the road.
The bottom line is you can give yourself a better chance at making up by simply making things easier on your ex boyfriend. Accept this break up for what it is and give your partner some space. At the very least you will earn their respect and trust...two valuable components that you'll need to solve your relationship problems.
The problem is that most of the things you are want to say (I'm sorry, I love you, etc.) only make things harder on your ex. They don't feel the same way you do right now, and when you throw out words like "love" it puts them in a bad position. Most boyfriends are not out to destroy your life, they have simply come to a crossroads in their time with you. Apologies and proclamations of your love are words that call for a response...but in this case your ex has nothing positive to say back.
But what if you could take away the pressure and make it easy for your ex boyfriend to make up with you? Choosing the path of least resistance is not necessarily the easy choice when your gut if filled with swirling emotions. However, for the long term it gives you the best chance of getting back with your ex.
Think of it this way...if you had something difficult to tell someone how would you want them to respond? What would your perception of them be if they freaked out about the news? How would it be different if they handled the same news with grace and respect? As you probably see, the latter makes things much easier and leaves things in position for more discussion down the road.
The bottom line is you can give yourself a better chance at making up by simply making things easier on your ex boyfriend. Accept this break up for what it is and give your partner some space. At the very least you will earn their respect and trust...two valuable components that you'll need to solve your relationship problems.
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