The most interesting thing about people who stalk their ex is that 99% of them know they shouldn't do it. If you asked them what their ex boyfriend would think about their actions, most would agree it would not make him happy. But even those who know better can find the temptation to spy on their ex hard to ignore. In many instances, the thrill of "playing detective" becomes addictive and causes them to cross the line of appropriate behavior. At some point they get caught and their already broken relationship is suddenly on life support.
So what can you do if you get caught stalking your ex boyfriend? Well, the first step is to simply be honest about your actions. The more you try to cover things up with lies and excuses the harder you are going to have to work to win your ex back. It is better to just admit your faults, apologize, and walk away from the whole mess for a while. Obviously your ex is going to be upset and it could be several weeks until they have calmed down enough to start talking with them again.
When it does come time to talk again, one of the best strategies is to inject some humor about yourself. Tell your ex how embarrassed you felt about your actions, and make fun of yourself for all the silly things you did. This should be easy since it really is embarrassing to get caught stalking! Make sure you tell them that the only reason you acted so stupid was because you still had strong feelings for them. Use the word "had" to suggest your feelings are different now. This will make them curious about how you feel now.
From there you will simply have to see how they react to your apology. If they laugh with you when you tell your side of the story then your odds are good for getting another chance. Play along and be patient with everything. Just be happy you are talking again for now, and slowly build up the levels of attraction over a few weeks. Your ex is going to need some time to trust you again after your erratic behavior.
Showing posts with label ex back. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ex back. Show all posts
When Will Your Ex Boyfriend Come Back?
It is easy to let impatience get the better of you after being dumped. Your ego has taken a hit and you desperately need answers to all of the questions he left you with. Why did this happen? Was it your fault? Will he ever talk to you again?
This strong need for validation comes from all of the confusion a breakup creates. There is much stress in your life, and getting answers makes you feel more secure…even if they are not the ones you want. Unfortunately, pressuring your ex boyfriend with questions about your breakup will not help your cause. Many guys will run away if they feel trapped, so your best bet is to let the healing come naturally.
How long will it take for your ex to come around? Most of it depends on why they left and how long you were together. If he dumped you because you were cheating then you might have to wait for him to have his own fling before he feels comfortable enough to talk with you. Generally, the longer your relationship lasted the less time it takes to approach each other. If you have only dated a couple weeks, then it may very well be over for good.
There are things you can do to help him come back faster. Give him some space for starters so that he has time to think about everything. Always be positive when you are around him or his friends. You don't want to play the role of "Debbie Downer" because no one wants to hang out with a loser. Don't be afraid to show up at the same social functions. This is your best chance to make a move. Start by being friendly and gently remind him of how good things can be when you are together ;)
Perhaps the most important point to keep in mind is that your ex will come back when he is ready. Trying to pressure him into a decision will undoubtedly backfire. If you simply can't wait for him to make up his own mind then you should at least make him think it was his idea. This is not always easy but it can be done. First you need to get him to talk to you again and then you can turn up the romance. The key is to keep him wanting more, but never giving in until he makes his move.
Patience may not be easy to come by after a break up. However, if you can hold back your emotions and entice your ex to make a move, you will get him back faster than you ever thought possible.
This strong need for validation comes from all of the confusion a breakup creates. There is much stress in your life, and getting answers makes you feel more secure…even if they are not the ones you want. Unfortunately, pressuring your ex boyfriend with questions about your breakup will not help your cause. Many guys will run away if they feel trapped, so your best bet is to let the healing come naturally.
How long will it take for your ex to come around? Most of it depends on why they left and how long you were together. If he dumped you because you were cheating then you might have to wait for him to have his own fling before he feels comfortable enough to talk with you. Generally, the longer your relationship lasted the less time it takes to approach each other. If you have only dated a couple weeks, then it may very well be over for good.
There are things you can do to help him come back faster. Give him some space for starters so that he has time to think about everything. Always be positive when you are around him or his friends. You don't want to play the role of "Debbie Downer" because no one wants to hang out with a loser. Don't be afraid to show up at the same social functions. This is your best chance to make a move. Start by being friendly and gently remind him of how good things can be when you are together ;)
Perhaps the most important point to keep in mind is that your ex will come back when he is ready. Trying to pressure him into a decision will undoubtedly backfire. If you simply can't wait for him to make up his own mind then you should at least make him think it was his idea. This is not always easy but it can be done. First you need to get him to talk to you again and then you can turn up the romance. The key is to keep him wanting more, but never giving in until he makes his move.
Patience may not be easy to come by after a break up. However, if you can hold back your emotions and entice your ex to make a move, you will get him back faster than you ever thought possible.
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